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TIME: Almanac 1995
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<text id=90TT0464>
<title>
Feb. 19, 1990: America's New Fad:Fidelity
</title>
<history>
TIME--The Weekly Newsmagazine--1990
Feb. 19, 1990 Starting Over
</history>
<article>
<source>Time Magazine</source>
<hdr>
BEHAVIOR, Page 91
America's New Fad: Fidelity
</hdr>
<body>
<p>A surprising poll says the sexual revolution is overrated
</p>
<p> Conventional wisdom in the thirtysomething era declares that
the American marriage is in serious trouble: a sky-high divorce
rate, new stresses and tensions in the sex wars and easy
opportunities for extramarital adventures. Not so, according
to a new survey conducted by Gallup for Psychology Today and
two national TV programs, King World's Inside Edition and ABC's
HOME. Although some experts question its accuracy, the poll
indicates Americans are surprisingly and happily monogamous.
In the survey, 90% of husbands and wives said they had never
been unfaithful to their spouses, and most gave high approval
ratings to their mates.
</p>
<p> The poll's findings will appear in Psychology Today's March
issue, along with an analysis written by the magazine's editor
in chief, T. George Harris, and the orchestrator of the survey,
Father Andrew Greeley. Greeley, a professor of sociology at the
University of Arizona, is probably best known as what Spy
magazine might call an un-bosomy dirty-book writer; his
lust-strewn pop novels (The Cardinal Sins; St. Valentine's
Night) regularly make the best-seller charts. Considering the
widespread publicity given to marital cheating, Greeley admits
that the survey results were "something of a surprise."
"People may talk more than they actually do," says the celibate
Roman Catholic priest, who plans to expand his research into
a book tentatively called Faithful Attraction. "Boasting about
one's sexual achievement is nothing new. Not many people boast
about being virtuous." Adds Harris: "The secret side of sex is
faithfulness."
</p>
<p> Nearly two-thirds of the poll's 657 randomly selected
respondents, who were queried by telephone shortly before
Christmas, said they were "very happy" in their marriage. Four
of five said they would wed the same person again, given the
chance. Three out of four described their spouses as physically
attractive. According to the poll, the three key factors in
making a marriage happy are communication, cooperation in child
rearing and housework and having a romantic image of one's
partner. Some 20% or more said they occasionally indulged in
such erotic activities as taking showers with their spouses,
making love outdoors and watching X-rated videos together. By
modest statistical margins, Catholics appear to be more
sexually adventurous than Protestants.
</p>
<p> Harris and Greeley argue that the nation may be experiencing
a negative backlash to the sexual revolution. They note, for
example, that 51% of women under 35 regretted having had a
premarital sexual encounter (though only 16% of men felt that
way). Meanwhile, according to another poll, the percentage of
Americans who disapproved of extramarital sex rose from 84% in
1973 to 91% in 1988.
</p>
<p> There are some sharp challenges to the poll's roseate view
of American wedlock. Says June Reinisch, director of the Kinsey
Institute in Bloomington, Ind.: "We estimate that approximately
37% of married men and 29% of married women have at least one
extramarital affair." A survey conducted by Lillian Rubin, a
sociologist at Queens College in New York City, shows a 40%
infidelity rate for spouses. Greeley and Harris have two
explanations for the disparity between their poll's results and
the conventional wisdom: 1) most sexual surveys are either
obsolete or unscientific; 2) people are victims of what the
authors call "pluralistic ignorance." Translation: erroneous
beliefs shared by some individuals about other people. Even the
enchanted spouses in the P.T. poll did not believe their
commitment to fidelity was widely shared.
</p>
<p>By John Elson. Reported by Andrea Sachs/New York.
</p>
</body>
</article>
</text>